Ok! so I have a copy of the full screen play in my hands. I know the corrections, that I want to make in it! I have two people, one who works for a college and has an MA and another, who has experience with scripts and screen plays,...to help me fill in the technical blanks that my little seive of a mind cannot fill in,...and ARRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!! and I am all set to go...and Buzzer puts me on HOLD......again!!
WILL THESE PEOPLE AT DENSMOREIED PLEASE MAKE UP THEIR MINDS???????
I went to that stupid book party for them and stood around and acted like I was listening to people and ate chicken,..that had been soaked in balsamic vinegar for them, and ate those DAMNED fish eggs for them, and even ate those lousey boiled pine cone thingies....with a cheshire cat grin on my face!! and I cannot even know when I can start playing around with that screen play???? Working with Nellie was easier!!!!!!
I have been having dreams about what happened at the Silver Bridge...again. Someday,..I must come to terms with that episode in my life!! I am not ready to do so....yet!!

Tonight in chat...I talked about the falling of the Silver Bridge...bad memories all around. If I speak of it again,..I will have flash backs...so I will deny even talking about it to anyone,..who cannot access this blog.
Flashbacks!
What are they like for a Vietnam veteren? Does he relive the incident? I must try and be funny in my stories and blogs!!
Reality...bites. So from now...on...just..jokes and kidding around!!!

.....I read the screen play of WALKING FREE. It makes me look like some sort of....stupid......oh.......well. I am getting a copy of it perhaps tomorrow. At least,..I get a chance to make changes in it!! ....My word! I have never been a GLAMORPUSS.
....I ALREADY KNOW.....WHO I WANT TO PLAY ME AS AN OLDER ADULT!! She is an enperienced actress,..and has disabilities similar to mine!! MY HUSBAND refuses to listen to anything anything. He is not interested in any part of the business end of this. I must rely on the advice of strangers!! The movie is a go......if Densmorereid says, "Yes!" The movie will be made.
..I can use Dancing Wind and Questing Truth as advisors!! I can let them know,..but first,..Densmorereid MUST sign a contract!....before..anything can really be done!!
..NIB'S PRODUCTIONS........here we come!!

WALKING FREE, as of now, has TWO offers to make of it a movie!! One screenplay is already done!! I have yet to see it!! THE OTHER OFFER LETS ME WRITE PART OF THE SCREEN PLAY..AND PICK THE PERSON,..THAT PLAYS ME!!!
Again,..I have no control over which offer will be accepted. i do know that the cleveland Plain Dealer Article..should be out before the next week or so is up..and then,..I shall stop pinching myself...this is really happening!!
Accccccccccck!
All of my little life secrets out on a public screen???? What is going on here? I am almost breathless with excitment..and can't even make a joke of..anything!! NOW,..I KNOW THAT SOMETHING IS WRONG...WHEN I CANNOT MAKE A JOKE OF IT!!

O-k! My son wants me to learn how to ride a horse. He says that this will be stimulating for me and has talked his father into be living that such an outlandish activity will keep me from "getting wild ideas and keep me out of trouble!!"
Little does that boy know! His mama ain't built the same way that he is. An hour on horse-back.......and I was GETTING ALL SORTS OF IDEAS!!
TALK ABOUT STIMULATED!!!
Steam was coming out of my ears!! The pheromones were raging!! The horsie was not the only on who was HOT-TO-TROT!!
I immediately engaged our delightful 27 year old guide in a discussion about his immediate future. He....had...the most...wonderful waist length braid of jet black hair,..that hung down to his butt,..an oval face,..pink cheeks...(face!!!,..I planned on checking out the other end later.)
I had just had him nicely chatted up and old William comes up,..listens to the guide and I talkinng a bit,...and suddenly,..I find myself back on my horse,..and my beautiful young six foot guide boy.........about five horses up from me!!
I am going to call old Bill,.age 22 years old,,....a name that is not printable. He also requested a "cold shower" for me at the end of the trail ride!!
Weeell,..after three hours on that damned horse,..he need not have worried!! The place where Stanelle met the saddle on the horse.......was very sore indeed!! I am going to invest in foam rubber padded "drawers!"
Good Lord! I got blisters the size of silver dollars in certain patches of skin!! And in other areas onmy opposite ,..the skin is rubbed clean off!!
Gads!
Spending three hours with the tour guide...in a similar fashion that I spent it with the horse.......would have been much more fun!! My rear is in such a state now,..I would cuss out anyone,..who even dared to make me an offer!
EEEEEEYOOOOW!!!!
My darling son says that I have saddle sore. Well,..honey,..it ain't the saddle that is sore!! I will probably never be able to sit in a normal fashion again!!

Another new day! Another chance to live and breath in a whole new different way!!!
The fanboard,.that I have explored for opinions and ideas for such a long time,..has not completely died out. I have a feeling that it is going to be around for quite a while yet!!
This fanboad is the home of some of the most creative and rebellious people that it has ever been my fortune or misfortune to meet!!! Yet,..they are no different in certain ways than the rest of society feels to me,..I have written the same things that they write,.expressed the same views that some of them express,..talked to some of them via e-mail and recently chat,..and I still scare the shit out of some of them.
What is worse,..is that by occasionaly letting some of my younger friends and relatives use my ISP....OR whatever the term is that a person calls a computer terminal.....I find that I am given credit for some of my young friends' pranks and writings!!
Gaaaaaaaaah!!!!
I cannot understand why I cannot get into a writing mood. I guess it is because I have not met up with the BUZZER lately. She tells ME some of the thigs that she had to put up with as a Deaf when she came from the hills of Kentucky as a girl and I sit agahast that a human being could live through that sort of treatment and come out of it as relatively unscared as she is!! Her husband.......lived through an absolute hell as a child.
All I had to put up with was an ass of a shrink,..who said that "I didn't respond to people because of "mental deficiency!!" Jimmy, at age 22 years, looked at me and in five minutes said, "You aren't hearng properly. Accept it. Go getyour ears tested."
I did. I couldn't hear. My ears get stuffed up with mucus...in the middle ear? I am not sure of the mechanics.
I do have a sort of brain dmage, that I probably was born with,...that distorts sound. My great-aunt told me that I was blue.....when I was born and that I seemed to be slower to respond to sound as a newborn,..but that I always seemed to focus on what I could SEE! SHEEEEESH! Would not that in itself have been a slight CLUE..THAT something was wrong with the way that I was hearing things...if my great-aunt Mildred,..who only saw me several times a month,..could pick up on it??? I am not going into this as I am going to get upset if I do.
Thanks to my dear moher and her theories of "Train the kid to be normal and act normal..no matter what," I can "PASS"........as hearing till a person REALLY gets to know me. I should really pass on my mom's TRAINING TECHNIQUES"....to Osama bin Ladan!! (bad, bad,..bad,..joke!!)
Enough bitching about the past!! Enough self pity!! I still have to prove myself to me!!! The rest of the world is just...a part of a group of bystanders,....in certain areas. My internal life is dependent n me. I have just one BIG rule...cause as little distress and pain to others....as I can!! I DON'T have to spend my entire life raising hell in destructive ways......there are hundreds of "socially acceptable" ways to...provoke change!
Yiiipes!! Have to get ready to go to work!! Gotta go!